Kat Vellos is the author of “We Should Get Together: The Secret To Cultivating Better Friendships.” Her book was born from six years of in-depth research about not only how friendships change in adulthood, but also how they’ve shifted over the past few decades. Kat’s work has been featured in The New York Times, Forbes and TEDx.
In this episode, we discuss what chemistry looks like between friends, why the word awkward is overused, and how to nurture a friendship with yourself.
One of my favorite observations Kat’s made is how the media we consume doesn’t accurately reflect the way we exist in friendships. For example, in shows like Friends or Seinfeld, the characters all live across the hall from each other, they walk in to each others apartments whenever they want, they run errands together — and yet it’s becoming increasingly rare for us to take these actions in our own friendships. Meanwhile the rates of loneliness continue to increase.
Kat and I actually recorded this episode while we were both in lockdown so some of her techniques for creating and strengthening friendships weren’t applicable at the time, but now that we’re all starting to emerge from the confines of Covid and reexamining how our relationships may have changed over this past year, the advice in this episode feels even more timely.
Photo credit: Jamie Nease
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